Time To Go

When you show someone you’re vulnerable, it scares you. That’s normal. But it scares them too. They’re afraid they’ll have the responsibility of holding you up when they can barely stand themselves, because life is hard. There’s no free pass. Not everyone can rise to the challenge so they look for easy options where there is none, sacrificing chances for meaningful happiness in the process. You can’t blame them. They feel what they feel, think what they think,  and act accordingly. It doesn’t mean they made the right choice but they believe they did and no argument can be pitted against that.

Believing something doesn’t make it true but it does mean you won’t change your mind, at least in the short-term. This is why I believe nothing; I need to be agile, adaptable. To be safe I need escape routes. For if I get stuck believing something unhealthy I will surely perish.

Some things are undoubtedly true though. I try to differentiate myself by being completely honest. People don’t seem to like that. They don’t want to hear it. They want to be lied to, they want a fabrication, they don’t want to know real life.

It’s an interesting place to be in when you’re happy and sad at the same time. I feel it every day, moment by moment. It keeps me in limbo, constantly wondering what things mean. I have decided I don’t ever want answers. I want my reasoning, my thoughts, but I don’t want proof. I want conversation and discussion. I don’t want facts, or lecture.

There are too many normal people on Earth, where the mainstream continue to weed out alternatives; turning them, shunning them, or destroying them. So when a philosophy arises from a quiet mouth it’s crazy because there is no one left to fight for it. No one to say it’s right, or what the rest say is right is wrong. And no matter how innocent it is, it will not be accepted as most do not possess an open mind to even explore original thought. They ignore the autopilot that is driving their life until they die and wonder why they wasted do much time.

I am the same. It’s not so easy to get away but at least I want to.