thoughts of today

Sometimes I wake up

and wish I hadn’t

because whatever dream

I was having

was better than this.

Even though you weren’t there,

at least I didn’t know it.

 

There are photos of friends

that I am in,

that keep me afloat

but make me sad.

I want so much

for that happiness

to be my constant visage.

 

 

simple as that

I don’t rhyme very much

cos’ it’s much too tough,

the stress on my brain is way too rough.

Sometimes though, the pain is worth it.

I was floating in the surf

hoping it wasn’t a shark

pit,

thinkin’ about the girl I like

wondering if she’d had enough of me.

There’s something about her,

she’s got this aura I can’t ignore

and I adore her.

Every morning,

before the day comes swarming,

and too many thoughts fill my head

for me to get out of bed,

I see her face,

and hear the words I should have said.

But it’s not a race

and I wish for more time;

to make her mine,

to change her mind.

Make this something that’ll last,

make me forget my past.

I guess it’s a gamble,

the die is cast

and I tend to ramble

cos’ she makes me nervous

every time I try to speak about us.

I can’t be weak,

can’t let my resolve leak,

she has to know how I feel

and for my soul,

she has the power to heal.

 

 

Mood Music: Episode 5

I recently discovered a band that have been around for a while but were completely new to me. I’m so glad I did because I think they’re fantastic. If you haven’t heard of Wild Beasts, I suggest you check them out. I went through their whole discography in a weekend and cherry-picked 20-odd amazing songs to download.

The wonderful thing about this band is that the more you listen the better they get, there’s a great dynamic between their two vocalists and the music can be quirky, dark, and moving but always interesting.

The song that hits me the most is one called ‘Daughters’. I love how this track is so deep and dark and the way it builds is euphoric. Listen below.

to the betrothed

The sweet chirp of a parrot at the feeder

seems as innocent as your love.

When it breathes,

exhales pure oxygen.

When it clicks,

It doesn’t scrape.

There is no friction.

In this fusion

I see no confusion,

it pairs better than lemonade.

 

So much trust,

any storm that tried to rust it

would be exhausted.

You never have to force it.

A smooth union

I can base all my hope on.

A hand in the dark,

glowing like a flare.

 

A dam of love retention

swells with my attention.

The adoration emanating from your skin

and the gaze of child to idol,

are akin.

Makes me wonder

how I can rid all the tension

from within.

 

Open faces

hide nothing.

I’ve looked a thousand places,

not many will share that look.

An open book,

a pleasure to read.

You turn the pages

from one joy to another.

Delights that last

for ages.

Like an open window,

I see the spots I would go

if I could understand how you got there.

 

Each moment only takes it higher

for me to admire.

So much better

than me.

I doubt my mind will ever be that clear,

but for my heart

I will never say never.

 

It keeps me going

through the times I sit crying

about; all the things in the world dying,

all the people who are lying,

all the ones who struggle so hard

are barely just surviving,

all the values that need reviving

but everyone’s stopped trying.

 

The density and magic of hurtloam,

the intensity and comfort of feeling at home,

the guarantee of not being alone.

The golden taste of the season’s first fruit

reminds me of the smiles I see shared

between you.

I smile too.

I know,

in your hands

the world will be safe.

Mechanics (Body Parts)

When the tide turns,
I’ll let you know.
When my toes stop curling,
when my fingers aren’t clenching.

To be sensitive
can be emotionally expensive.
When I let go,
I’ll let you know.
When my vessels flow free,
when my muscles don’t contract.

It shouldn’t be so strange
to speak to someone.
When I find my range,
I’ll talk to you.
When my brain fires,
when my tongue unravels.

To move as one,
there needs to be fun.
When I find some,
I’ll take you there.
When my teeth straighten,
when my legs stop aching.

Warmth is not a temperature
it is an expression.
I feel it
when your eyes reach mine.
When my cheeks grow round,
when my heart pounds.

Is a dream just a desire
or a fear?
Is it nothing more?
You walk through my night
all the time.
Do you remember
the steps you took in my head?
Do you wake and get the sense
you didn’t spend all night in bed?

Complex doesn’t have to be hard,
simple isn’t always easy.
When I convince you
I won’t act like I won.
When my lips rise,
when my soul flies.

When you find someone,
you have to try.
Or be alone
the day you die.